“Your story is always worth sharing, but only when you’re ready.” 

 

Have you ever experienced something so unexpected that you wake up the next day and have to ask yourself “was it all a dream?” I’ve been a bit “off” for the past month as a result of such an experience. Last month, a sudden drastic change took place in my life- something that changed my entire trajectory in a couple of hours. I had to sit with the reality that adapting and restructuring my own plans would take time. I spent a lot of time thinking, writing, working, and (let’s be honest) catching up on my favorite TV shows.

 

Anyway, this sudden change knocked me off my cool and I was a bit stunned for a short while. I had to remind myself that I couldn’t get stuck in that moment. It is healthy and necessary to take time to deal with emotions- to be mad, frustrated, sad, and disappointed. It is natural to feel the need to mask those emotions behind smiles and going through your everyday routines when you’re not yet comfortable discussing your issues with others. After some time, though, I had to push myself to move past all of that and dedicate 100% of that energy to moving forward.

 

In moving forward, I found power in sharing my experience with close friends and receiving encouragement and support in my mission to continue sharing my story. While I am not yet ready to divulge every minute detail to the world, I know that when the time comes, it will be a powerful testimony. 

 

For now, know that no matter what, your story is always worth sharing, but only when you’re ready. Those moments that feel so unreal, unexpected, and almost crippling in many ways are the very ones that we try to protect from the world. For me, experiencing those moments emphasizes one of the downsides of being known as a “strong Black woman” who is actually quite sensitive, fragile, and sometimes too trusting of others that her well being is a priority, no matter how many times I’ve seen otherwise. Those moments, experiences, and stories are worth sharing here because they’re relatable, they connect us, and they grow this community through a kindred spirit that allows us to celebrate, laugh, cry, and encourage each other through the ups and downs- when we’re ready to share them. I love that Feminessay allows us to share on our own terms.

 

I can’t say enough how much I love this community or how many times my responsibility for keeping Feminessay available has kept me encouraged and served as a reminder that THIS work is my real passion and calling. I’m so glad that this space exists and that I have a community of women near and far who get it. Y’all have no idea how much every single one of you help me and so many others push through and thrive at our lowest points. Keep thinking. Keep writing. Keep sharing on your own terms and when you’re ready. I know I will.

 

 

—  Tiye Naeemah Cort,

     Founder + Global Editor-in-Chief, Feminessay